FUN LIBRARY

IMPORTANT QUESTIONS
We don't have the answers, but we sure do have the questions.

After eating, do amphibians have to wait one hour before getting out of the water?

If white wine goes with fish, do white grapes go with sushi?

If a mute child swears, does his mother make him wash his hands with soap?

If someone has a mid-life crisis while playing hide & seek, does he automatically lose because he can't find himself

What's another word for synonym?

If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?

When sign makers go on strike, what is written on their picket signs?

Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all"?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

Why are builders afraid to have a 13th floor but book publishers aren't afraid to have a Chapter 11?

How can there be self-help groups?

If you're traveling at the speed of light and you turn your headlights on, what happens?

What is the speed of dark?

Since cats always land on their feet and jelly bread always lands jelly-side down, what happens if you tie jelly bread to
the back of a cat?

When you're sending someone styrofoam, what do you pack it in?

Why are there Braille signs on drive-up ATM's?

If you have a friend who works for the Psychic Friends Network, should you plan a surprise birthday party for them?

If women wear a pair of pants, a pair of glasses, and a pair of earrings, why don't they wear a pair of bras?

If you take a shower, where do you put it?

If you BEAR a child, why do you have a COW?

Who tows the tow trucks when they break down?

How come you never hear about gruntled employees?

If God sneezes...what should you say?

What is a "free" gift? Aren't all gifts free?

Aren't all generalizations false?

Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?

Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited there?

Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime?

If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?

Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?

If a woman can be a meter maid, can a man be a meter butler?

Why is it that when you transport something by car, its called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship,
its called cargo?

Why do we play in recitals and recite in plays?

How do you know when yogurt goes bad?

If you spend your day doing nothing, how do you know when you're done?

Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?

Where are Preparations A through G?

If a tree falls in the woods, and lands on a mime, does anyone care?

Are there seeing eye humans for blind dogs?

If knees were backwards, what would chairs look like?

Just before someone gets nervous, do they experience cocoons in their stomach?

When you open a new bag of cotton balls, are you supposed to throw the top one away?

When your pet bird sees you reading the newspaper, does he wonder why you're just sitting there, staring at
carpeting?

When people lose weight, where does it go?

What happened to the first 6 "ups"?

Why is a women's prison called a penal colony?

If an orange is orange, why isn't a lime called a green or a lemon called a yellow?

Why don't sheep shrink in the rain?

Why does your nose run, and your feet smell?

If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?

If you ate pasta and anti-pasta, would you still be hungry?

What do sheep count when they can't sleep?

Why do we have hot water heaters? Isn't hot water already hot?

Why do airlines call flights nonstop? Won't they all stop eventually?

Does anybody ever vanish with a trace?

If you dive into a pool of dry ice, can you swim without getting wet?

If the folks at the "psychic hotlines" were really psychic, wouldn't they call you first?

Why do they mark containers "This end up"? If you can read the marking, isn't that end already up?

Why do fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing?

Why is it so hard to remember how to spell mnemonic?

Why is it called a TV "set" when you only get one?

Why is it, whether you sit up or sit down, the result is the same?

Why is there an expiration date on sour cream?

If you keep trying to prove Murphy's Law, will something keep going wrong?

Shouldn't there be a shorter word for monosyllabic?

Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

Would a fly without wings be called a walk?

Can you be a closet claustrophobic?

Does the Postmaster General need a stamp of approval?

If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success?

If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?

If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?

Should vegetarians eat animal crackers?

What is another word for thesaurus?

If the funeral procession is at night, do folks drive with their lights off?

If you're cross-eyed and have dyslexia can you read correctly?

If a stealth bomber crashes in a forest, will it make a sound?

If the cops arrest a mime, do they have to tell him he has the right to remain silent?

What do you do when you see an endangered animal that eats only endangered plants?

Why is the word abbreviate so long?